We are like this only so true, so very true……….

1. Everything you eat is savored in garlic, onion and tomatoes.

2.. You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and of course aluminum foil.

3. You are always standing next to the two largest size suitcases at the Airport.

4. You arrive one or two hours late to a party – and think it’s normal.

5. You peel the stamps off letters that the Postal Service missed to stamp.

6. You recycle Wedding Gifts, Birthday Gifts and Anniversary Gifts.

7. You name your children in rhythms (example, Sita & Gita, Ram & Shyam, Kamini & Shamini..)

8. All your children have pet names, which sound nowhere,
close to their real names.

9. You take Indian snacks anywhere it says ‘No Food Allowed.’

10. You talk for an hour at the front door when leaving someone’s house.

11. You load up the family car with as many people as possible.

12. HIGH PRIORITY ***** You use plastic to cover anything new in your house
whether it’s the remote control, VCR, carpet or new couch. *****

13. Your parents tell you not to care what your friends think, but they won’t let you do certain things because of what the other ‘Uncles and Aunties’ will think.

14. You buy and display crockery, which is never used, as it is for special occasions, which never happen.

15. You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table.

16.. You use grocery bags to hold garbage.

17. You keep leftover food in your fridge in as many numbers of bowls as possible.

18. Your kitchen shelf is full of jars, varieties of bowls and plastic utensils (got free with purchase of other stuff)

19. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel
(and travel means any car ride longer than 15 minutes).

20. You own a rice cooker or a pressure cooker.

21. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.

22. You live with your parents and you are 40 years old. (And they prefer it that way).

23. You don’t use measuring cups when cooking.

24. You never learnt how to stand in a queue.

25. You can only travel if there are 5 persons at least to see you off or receive you whether you are traveling by bus, train or plane.

26. If she is NOT your daughter, you always take interest in knowing whose daughter has run with whose son and feel proud to spread it at the velocity of more than the speed of light.

27. You only make long distance calls after 11p.m.

28. If you don’t live at home, when your parents call, they ask if you’ve eaten, even if it’s midnight.

29. You call an older person you never met before Uncle or Aunty.

30. When your parents meet strangers and talk for a few minutes, you discover you’re talking to a distant cousin.

31. Your parents don’t realize phone connections to foreign
countries have improved in the last two decades, and still scream at the top of their lungs when making foreign calls.

32. You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep them
from getting dirty.

33. Its embarrassing if you’re wedding has less than 600 people.

34. All your Tupperware is stained with food color.

35. You have drinking glasses made of steel.

36. You have mastered the art of bargaining in shopping.

37. You have really enjoyed reading this mail – forward it
to as many Indians as possible.

I STILL LOVE TO BE AN INDIAN

When you were 1 year old, she fed you and bathed you.
You thanked her by crying all night long.

When you were 2 years old, she taught you to walk.
You thanked her by running away when she called.

When you were 3 years old, she made all your meals with love.
You thanked her by tossing your plate on the floor.

When you were 4 years old, she gave you some crayons
You thanked her by coloring the dining room table.

When you were 5 years old, she dressed you for the holidays.
You thanked her by plopping into the nearest pile of mud

When you were 6 years old, she walked you to school.
You thanked her by screaming, “I’M NOT GOING!”

When you were 7 years old, she bought you a baseball.
You thanked her by throwing it through the next-door-neighbor’s window.

When you were 8 years old, she handed you an ice cream.
You thanked her by dripping it all over your lap.

When you were 9 years old, she paid for piano lessons.
You thanked her by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 years old she drove you all day, from soccer to gymnastics to one birthday party after another.
You thanked her by jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, she took you and your friends to the movies.
You thanked her by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, she warned you not to watch certain TV shows.
You thanked her by waiting until she left the house.

When you were 13, she suggested a haircut that was becoming.
You thanked her by telling her she had no taste.

When you were 14, she paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked her by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, she came home from work, looking for a hug.
You thanked her by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, she taught you how to drive her car.
You thanked her by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, she was expecting an important call.
You thanked her by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, she cried at your high school graduation.
You thanked her by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, she paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus, carried your bags.
You thanked her by saying good-bye outside the dorm so you wouldn’t be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 20, she asked whether you were seeing anyone.
You thanked her by saying, “It’s none of your business.”

When you were 21, she suggested certain careers for your future.
You thanked her by saying, “I don’t want to be like you.”

When you were 22, she hugged you at your college graduation.
You thanked her by asking whether she could pay for a trip to Europe.

When you were 23, she gave you furniture for your first apartment.
You thanked her by telling your friends it was ugly.

When you were 24, she met your fiance and asked about your plans for the future.
You thanked her by glaring and growling, “Muuhh-ther, please!”

When you were 25, she helped to pay for your wedding, and she cried and told you how deeply she loved you.
You thanked her by moving halfway across the country.

When you were 30, she called with some advice on the baby.
You thanked her by telling her, “Things are different now.”

When you were 40, she called to remind you of a relative’s birthday.
You thanked her by saying you were “really busy right now.”

When you were 50, she fell ill and needed you to take care of her.
You thanked her by reading about the burden parents become to theirchildren.

And then, one day, she quietly died. And everything you never did
came crashing down like thunder… ah, if only …….

IF YOUR ARE LUCKY AND SHE’S STILL AROUND, MAKE A DIFFERENCE FOR HER -
AND THANK HER PROPERLY…

A young man wished to marry the farmer’s beautiful daughter. He went to the farmer to ask his permission. The farmer looked him over and said, Son, go stand out in that field. I’m going to release three bulls, one at a time. If you can catch the tail of any one of the three bulls, you can marry my daughter.

The young man stood in the pasture awaiting the first bull. The barn door opened and out ran the biggest, meanest-looking bull he had ever seen. He decided that one of the next bulls had to be a better choice than this one, so he ran over to the side and let the bull pass through the pasture out the back gate. The barn door opened again. Unbelievable. He had never seen anything so big and fierce in his life.

It stood pawing the ground, grunting, slinging slobber as it eyed him. Whatever the next bull was like, it had to be a better choice than this one. He ran to the fence and let the bull pass through the pasture, out the back gate.

The door opened a third time. A smile came across his face. This was the weakest, scrawniest little bull he had ever seen. This one was his bull. As the bull came running by, he positioned himself just right and jumped at just the exact moment. He grabbed. but the bull had no tail!

Life is full of opportunities. Some will be easy to take advantage of, some will be difficult. But once we let them pass (often in hopes of something better), those opportunities may never again be available. So always grab the first opportunity .

Never walk without a document in your hands

People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in thier hands look like they’re heading for the canteen. People with a newspaper in their hand look like they’re heading for the toilet. Above all, make sure you carry loads of stuff home with you at night, thus generating hte flase impression that you work longer hours than you do.

Use computers to look busy

Any time you use a computer, it looks like “work” to

• Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either, just fuck off and leave me alone.
• The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tyre.
• The darkest hours come just before the dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbour’s milk and newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
• Sex is like air. It only becomes really important when you aren’t getting any.
• Don’t aspire to become irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
• Remember, no-one is listening until you fart.
• Never forget that you are unique, like everyone else.
• Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
• If you think nobody cares whether you’re dead or alive, try missing a couple of mortgage payments
• Before you judge someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you judge them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
• If at first you don’t succeed, avoid skydiving.
• Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
• Have you ever lent someone $20 and never seen that person again? It was probably worth it.
• If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
• Some days we are the flies; some days we are the windscreen.
• Don’t worry; it only seems kinky the first time.
• Good judgment comes from experience, experience comes from bad judgment.
• The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
• A closed mouth gathers no feet.
• There are two theories about how to win an argument with a woman. Neither one works.
• Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much if your lips are moving.
• Never miss a good chance to shut up.
• Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
• When we are born we are naked, wet, hungry, and we get smacked on our arse. From there on in, life gets worse
• The most wasted day of all is one in which we have not laughed.
• Remember not to forget that which you do not need to know.

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone
we didn’t already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.
I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that that lit up her entire being.

She said, “Hi, handsome. My name is Rose. I’m eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?” I laughed
and enthusiastically responded, “Of course you may!” and she gave me a giant squeeze.

“Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?” I asked.

She jokingly replied, “I’m here to meet a rich husband, get married, have a couple of children, and then retire and travel.”

“No seriously,” I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

“I always dreamed of having a college education and now I’m getting one!” she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and share a chocolate milkshake. We became instant friends.
Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop.
I was always mesmerized listening to this “time machine” as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went.
She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I’ll never forget what she taught us.
She was introduced and stepped up to the podium.
As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.
Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, “I’m sorry I’m so jittery. I gave up beer for
Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I’ll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know.”

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began: “We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.
There are only few secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. “You have to laugh and find humor every day.
You’ve got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die.
We have so many people walking around who are dead and don’t even know it!”

“There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up.
If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don’t do one productive thing,
you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for
a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn’t take any talent or ability.
The idea is to grow up by always finding the opportunity in change.”

“Have no regrets. The elderly usually don’t have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do.
The only people who fear death are those with regrets.”

She concluded her speech by courageously singing The Rose. She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in
our daily lives. At the years end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep.

Remember : GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY, GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL

1. Regular naps prevent old age… Especially if you take them while driving.

2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee.

3. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

4. They said we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried- but they wanted cash.

5. A child’s greatest period of growth is the month after you’ve purchased new school uniforms.

6. Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.

7. Don’t marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without…
But whatever you do, you’ll regret it later.

8. You can’t buy love. . But you pay heavily for it.

9. True friends stab you in the front.

10. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.

11. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

12. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.

13. My wife and I always compromise. I admit I’m wrong and she agrees with me.

14. Those who can’t laugh at themselves leave the job to others.

15. Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

16. It doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.

17. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.

18. Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.

19. Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.

20. Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books

This story tells us something about LOVE & LIFE.

My husband is S/W Engineer by profession, I love him for his steady

nature and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders.

Two years of courtship and now, five years into marriage,

I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it.

The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness.

I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings.

I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy.

My husband is my complete opposite; his lack of sensitivity,

and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about LOVE.

One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision,

that I wanted a divorce.

“Why?” he asked, shocked.

“I am tired. There are no reasons for everything in the world!” I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, seemingly in deep thought.

My feeling of disappointment only increased.

Here was a man who was not able to even express his predicament,

so what else could I expect from him?

A nd finally he asked me: “What can I do to change your mind?”

Somebody said it right… It’s hard to change a person’s personality,

and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered: “Here is the question.

If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind.

Let’s say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff,

and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?”

He said: “I will give you your answer tomorrow….

” My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

I woke up the next morning to find him gone,

and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting underneath a milk glass,

on the dining table near the front door, that goes….

My dear, “I would not pick that flower for you,

but….please allow me to explain the reasons further…..

This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading.

” When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs,

and you cry in front of the screen.

I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.

You always leave the house keys behind,

thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.

You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city.

I have to save my eyes to show you the way.

You always have the cramps whenever your “good friend” approaches every month.

I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy.

You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism.

I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

Y ou always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes.

I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old,

I can help to clip your nails and help to remove those annoying white hairs.

So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach,

as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand…

and tell you the colour of flowers,

just like the colour of the glow on your young face…

Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than

I do… I could not pick that flower yet, and die … ”

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting. ..

And as I continue on reading… “Now, that you have finished reading my answer,

and if you are satisfied, please open the front door for

I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk…

I rushed to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face,

clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread….

Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he

does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone…

That’s LIFE, and LOVE. When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away,

and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

Love shows up in all forms; even in very small and cheeky forms.

It has never been a model. It could be the dullest and most boring form …

Flowers, and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship.

Under all this, the pillar of true love stands… AND THAT’S LIFE